12:30 p.m. Hospital has been crazy all day. I work in emergency medicine, and my husband is in advertising; we both commute into the city every day on the train. I always look around at everyone on the train and wonder what skeletons they’re hiding in their closets. Who else is leading a double life?
I text M asking how his weekend was because he hasn’t messaged me yet. He loves to play head games. It’s his thing. Anxiety hits a peak once I hit send on the text message … I never know when he will respond.
12:45 p.m. Time for a “bathroom break.” Because I have a lot of anxiety, I counteract that with a lot of masturbation — usually about seven or eight times a day. Luckily, we have private bathrooms in our section of the hospital. It literally takes me all of 20 seconds to get myself off so I make a lot of very short bathroom visits over the course of my day. Better than popping Xanax, right?
- The Cut
